I love my brother. I don't see him much, but I love him. It's not something I think of often, but I was reminded today. After classes were done I went to the mall to pay my credit cards and then to the doctors. I was humming to myself. I had just bought new pajamas and I was so happy. I pulled into the driveway and sitting there was a car. The front rims were on the ground... the tires had burned off. The metal was showing through every where but there in the midst of the peeling blacked paint on the rear of the car I noticed an Atticus bumper sticker... just like the one on my brothers car. I paused for a moment, my heart pounding. Before rushing to the house... I don't remember opening the door, only the sound of my voice screaming his name over and over. I rushed to his room and though I could see he wasn't there I called again. "WHERE ARE YOU???" I rushed upstairs and pounded my mom's number into the phone... no answer. I tried her other phone... no answer. I am in tears... sobbing like a little child. I rush out to my car to try her work number and she answers, "MOMMIE!!! WHERE'S JAY???" I sob into the phone...

He is fine. I'm sitting in my driveway, lost and sobbing and he's fine. I have never wanted to kill my brother more then I did at that moment. And I have never been more grateful in my whole life that I wasn't an only child. I don't say it enough and we try not to acknowledge it. But I love you Jay... Always. Forever. 

So I'm sitting in my room listening to I Want You by Pulp, the wind howling around the house and the rain splattering about. It's not the best of days... not the worst of days I suppose. I fell asleep in art class while Jenny was drawing my portrait. Grand High Nelson assigned twenty four drawings this week... I geuss to make up for the ones we'll miss over Thanksgiving. Our history test is friday and I have a paper due in english and psych. I'm so tired of it all. Getting up and going to school then coming home and trying desprately to remember all the things I'm supposed to do. And there's always so much of it. I had a physical today and got my menengitis shot and they told me I lost six pounds... well I say no wonder. And you sit and wonder why you should even bother. Keep your room clean, make doctor's appointments, and dentist appointments, and go get your eyes checked, wash your car, do your home work, don't forget to eat... over and over and over. Until your head hurts and your body is sore. Is it all worth it? I haven't even called work to get my hours. Theres just so much to do.

Maybe I should take a nap. 

It's been a decent day. Lots on my to do list, but I'm having trouble caring. The four linear perspecive drawings are due tomorrow, so I'll prolly end up doing at least one tomorrow. I contemplated stabbing my eye out with my pen in math class today, but I realized even that wouldn't save me from the numbers. Numbers how I loathe thee.

Went to Jess' after class and we went out to lunch at the chinese buffet. The have such lovely food. I heart those meat sticks. And of course there's the Fortune Cookie.

I love the Fortune Cookie because according to it I am sociable and entertaining, I am the master of every situation, I will be unusually successful in business, and the path of life will always lead upward. Oh that God was a forune cookie writer.

After lunch, we went up to his house to work on my english video. We had about an hour to spare before his classes started and I just didn't feel like doing it. So I have no video. O well.

I do however have a large psych paper due and a comparison paper for english that was due today. I'de better get writing. So I geuss that's a not so sucky day... not reall awesome either though... Shame. 

Well apparently that is a real english sentence. So I did. I cashed out the OdLoc and split. Now I'm a certified bank teller for Citizen's Bank. Am I proud? In a way. And it pays good money, so I'm happy at the very least. To make it better the Instructor was dying to get home and watch the Eagles game and we were out of the building by four o' clock. The drive home went quickly, but 76 even has traffic at four on a Sunday... sad.

I finished up my background. It's a beautiful collage of the SinFest characters and logo, the Real Life logo, a pic of Cherry from RPG World and its logo, the MURR T-Shirt logo from S*P and it's real logo. Then I've got a picture of Jay and Silent Bob next to the words, "It's not who you love; it's how" from the Chasing Amy page The front of the High Fidelity DVD and the cover from The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide. It's also got an awesome pic of the words "you are dumb" in binary. The Blather logo is at the top and just below that the Hellsing logo. Then a picture of Vash the Stampede and the drawing of me and Tim I did. I like it, though, I'd like to add more.


Jess came over for a bit and we had fun. I'm pretty tired, for me. It's freaky. I don't have art class tomoro, so no Circle time. =( But it gives me time for my nap. And I do need one. I've definately got to study for my History test though. So It won't be all fun and games.

Night for now though.